Episode #6 - The Greatest Leadership Tool

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Welcome to Be x Do = Have, a simple formula to uncomplicate your life. My name is Malvin Young. I'm a speaker, entrepreneur and brand partnership manager with a well-known TV production company. This show is about a straightforward formula that I've used to coach hundreds of people over the last 15 years, to overcome many challenges. 

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Personally, I don't like to coach on any area of life that I haven't improved on myself. So, lucky for you, I've had to overcome big challenges in the areas of relationship, finances, health, anxiety and depression. Then, after a crazy car accident, I had to do it all over again. 

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I'm really excited about the show today, because what I'm about to share with you is made a huge impact on my life, and more importantly, I've seen many others who have practiced these methods, break through barriers that have been holding them back their entire lives.

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Also, please subscribe to get the most value out of this podcast, as each episode will build on each other. 

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Welcome to episode number six - the greatest leadership tool. 

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What is leadership? Well, when I look at the definition online, the first thing I see is, 'the action of leading a group of people or an organisation'. I also have similar, 'the state or position of being a leader, as well as the leaders of an organisation or country, etc'. 

[01:28]  

Now, for about 15 years, I've spent time inside of organisations, asking questions around business culture and one of the questions I would ask is, when I'd have all the executives sitting at a table, I would ask them, 'what is your organization's definition of leadership?', and it was funny because, most of them didn't have that defined. But I heard a bunch of answers. I'd go around the table and I'd hear people say things like, 'you know, someone who does extraordinary things', and 'somebody who works really hard' and 'somebody who's in an executive position', you know, they would define these things as leadership. 

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And when I was on a leadership call, a few years back, I heard probably the best definition I've ever heard of leadership, and that was 'not something that is appointed to a person, but rather chosen by the people who choose to follow that person, or organisation'. And that's interesting, because that is, that really is leadership and it's not chosen by a person themselves by saying, 'Hey, I'm a leader', or someone because they're in a supervisor role or a executive role of vice president role; that doesn't mean leadership. That's just a position. Leadership is truly chosen by the people who choose to follow a person. 

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Now, if you look back at history, there are many leaders that we talk about today that really fall under that definition, like Gandhi, being one of them. You know, he stood for something; yeah, so that was his action; he stood for something, but the reality was, his leadership wasn't identified until the people believed enough in him, to start following him and they chose to follow him and what he believed in and that same thing goes for almost any leader that we look at in history, good or bad. 

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So, we can take another person. Hitler, for example. Most people don't realise, but if you look at Hitler's, the history of Hitler, he falls under the category of being one of the top leaders in the world. Now remember, I said good or bad, leadership is really irrelevant here, if it's good or bad. Leadership is leadership. Because remember, it is chosen by the people who choose to follow a person or organisation. 

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Now Hitler was one of those people that were chosen by the people to follow. Why would they choose somebody who is so bad? Why would they choose somebody that was, you know, killing people that, you know, look like had only bad intentions? Well, here's the reality. At the time, all other appointed leaders, not leadership, but appointed leader; so let's talk about these people were more along the lines of your government officials, in that sense of leadership; now, those people were saying things, like we see in today's world, saying things like, 'I'm going to do this for the people', 'I'm going to do that for the people' but falling short of their promises. And why people in Germany decided to follow Hitler, had a lot more to do with his word.

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So, he would say, I'm going to do X, and he would do x. So, what happens then? People decide, well, I better listen, because what he says he's going to do, he does. And therefore, he developed his leadership. Same as Gandhi, you know, he stood for something and he stood long enough and people started to believe him and when they saw him standing long enough for something, they chose him to be their leader. So, leadership is something that's chosen by the people. It's not something that a person decides or is appointed. 

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Now, you can develop leadership skills and within these skills sets, people will believe who you are and what you're becoming and where you're going and what your vision is  and therefore, they will choose you to follow you in that journey. So, I want to talk about the greatest leadership tool that I have ever experienced, and I think it's great. It's not just a leadership tool. It's really a great performance tool. That's the word I was looking for. Something that's going to be easy, like really simple to follow and do, but, is also going to develop your leadership and it's gonna help you really become conscious of where your weaknesses are, where your strengths are and how you can improve on them on a day to day basis. 

[06:50]  

Now, this tool is actually a lot of fun and that's why I think it's dismissed in a lot of cases. It actually looks so simple and in the leadership development world, I think a lot of people just dismiss this tool, because they look at it, they go 'to simple, yeah, makes sense' and us human beings need to be complicated, we need to be complex, we have very complex brains. So therefore, we dismiss these little simple tools that can make a huge difference in our lives. 

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You know, recently I'm reading a book called think like a monk and it talks about how you can use the monk type of mindsets and thought patterns and apply it to your everyday life; in business, in your health, in relationships; and truly make a difference. But they're so simple, that for many years, the business world has really dismissed them and really didn't look at them, where today, you know, thinking like a monk is becoming more and more of an adopted type of processes or thought patterns within the business world. 

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So, I want to share this simple tool with you today that I think is going to make a huge difference for you, if you choose to participate and I've said that in my last podcast a few times is that, you know, we're going to learn these things, but if we don't take action, if we don't actually try it on and, you know, if we don't try it all, we really won't see the difference that we're looking for and we don't try it on long enough; that's another challenge; there's people that try things for two to three days and then they stop and go back to the regular patterns and what happens is they fall into the same result. 

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So, I want to give this to you because it's so simple. and it is something that you can do every single day. It takes about five minutes. So how about that, guys? Five minutes a day to develop your leadership. If we can afford five minutes of our day to improve ourselves, every single day, then we have to start asking other questions about ourselves and what do we truly want. So, the tool's called earn your leadership and really what we're doing is we're breaking down the acronym, EARN. E. A. R. N. and and we're using this as a tool to measure for different areas of our life.

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Now these four different areas are based off of all peak performance studies where they look at people and they look back at what are the areas of your life that, if monitored and improved on, it will have a profound effect on all other areas of your life and outcomes. 

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The first one is E and it stands for Exercise. The second one is A and it stands for Attitude. The third one is R and it stands for Rejuvenation. The next one is N and it stands for Nutrition and when you look at leadership development programmes today, they all eventually come down to these four areas to focus on.

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There are other areas to focus on, and I will expand later, but for now, we just start by focusing on these four areas of our life. So, the first area exercise, second area attitude. The third area is rejuvenation and fourth area is nutrition. Very important to understand that we don't need to make this hard. As a matter of fact, we want to make it as simple as possible here. So, when I was told this, they said, 'we want you to measure from one to five, each area, every evening' and I thought, well, that's simple. All I have to do is reflect on my day and write down a number and that's all you really have to do. But, let me first tell you how we want to go ahead and utilise the numbers from one to five. 

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So, if I was looking at exercise, my E area, I would write down a number at the end of the day. I would reflect back, and I would look at my day and I would say, 'well, you know what, I woke up, I did some yoga and I went for a nice 45-minute walk today'. So, for me, I would give myself a 4. I was really actively participating today. Now, this is very subjective work here and what I may see a for is for someone else, it may be a 2. 

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An example of that is, when I was coaching, I had a client who was a mixed martial arts trainer and he was growing his business and I decided I was going to do some mindset training for him and he was going to give me some physical exercise training. So we trade it off with each other and so, I gave him this tool to really get, you know, his leadership skills going here and start observing himself and I remember when I sat back with him to go over his numbers in his exercise area, he was writing 2's down every day. 

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Now, here is a top athlete, mixed martial arts trainer who has to be conditioned. The guy does like 2-3 hours, maybe more of working out in a day. Now, I asked him why you're writing 2's and he said to me, 'well, you know, I've only done about like 200 reps of each of my workouts today, less than two hours of workout man, like it's a 2'. 

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See, in my world, if I were to do that much working out, I would have to write a 10 even though there is no 10, but you know, in my world, that's where I would be. But in his world, it was a 2 and that's great, because he knew he wasn't giving his best. A 2 for him was just, it was it was low. He wasn't giving his best only he can know that and for me a 4, of doing some nice yoga exercise and a 45 minute walk, could be a 4, for me because, I'm not a mixed martial artist, I don't do 2-3 hours of work out a day and I just do more general conditioning and I pushed myself within that conditioning and a 4 I think is a good number. It's an active number.

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So, I'm going to give you the guidelines around what they are. But again, it's very subjective. So, if I'm measuring my exercise and I reflect back on the day and if I were to put a 1, a 1 means I was just lazy. Like, I don't know what a 1 would have to be for me like if I went out and got hammered and woke up the next morning and slept on or laid on the couch because I was hungover I mean that would have to be a 1 for me, personally. 

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A number 2 would have to be, you know, I just woke up and got on with my day and I wasn't even thinking about exercise. It was just totally off the radar and just went on with my day, sat in the chair and do computer work all day. That would be a 2 for me. 

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3 is, you know, I did some exercises and some stretching through the day, a little walk with the dog around but, you know, maybe a 10-minute bike ride or I got on the exercise machine for 15 minutes. That's kind of a 3 like I did some activity. 

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4 is I'm conscious of exercise. Like, I planned my exercise and I did my exercise. So, that could have been I plan to do my yoga in the morning. I did it, did some stretching through the day and I went for a nice 45 minute walk. That was planned, it was active, it was something that I said I was going to do, and I did it. I usually give myself a 4 when I plan it out and I actually do those activities. 

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A 5 is when I pushed myself beyond. So, not only did I plan it and do it, I really went full out and I know that because I felt it, like I went really hard. So, that would be a 5 for me. So, you see how this could be subjective for each person and depending on their lifestyle and what they do for a living and all that kind of stuff, there's many variables. But don't worry, just write down the number that makes the most sense for you. 

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Attitude is the next one. So, if I were to sit down and measure my attitude at the end of the day and I were to think of numbers from 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, number 1would be like I had a really shitty attitude; I actually was angry, you know, when stuff happened in my day, I was reactive to it. I probably put people down, I might have gossiped, my attitude was just bad that day. 

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So, if I were to be at number 2, again, it's more like number 2's for me or like, I'm just unconscious of it and don't really care, wasn't thinking about attitude, just went on with my day and it was probably more on the poor side of the attitude. 

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Number 3 is I'm conscious. I made some good efforts. However, my attitude still wasn't the best, but at least, I was more conscious of my attitude and I did well in some events and not so well in others. So, I was conscious, aware but I still didn't make the best choices. That would be a number 3 for me. 

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And then a number 4; that would be a, you know, in my attitude, I would say, like, I woke up and I consciously planned to have a good attitude today and when life happened, I took the time to respond appropriately to it rather than react to it and in most cases, I think I had a good attitude and in some cases I may not have.

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Number 5 is like I planned it, to have a good attitude all day and no matter what happened, I surprised myself and no matter what happened that day, I would be above and beyond my attitude. So, just really impeccable attitude that day. That would be a number 5 for me. 

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So, rejuvenation. Rejuvenation is a funny one because we all look at it differently. We now live in a world where people argue about how much sleep do you actually need and how much rejuvenation do you need. So, this area is very subjective, based on so many different variables in each individual's lives. So, you have to try to measure it as best as you can, but rejuvenation for me, a number one would be like, I went to bed really late and I woke up early and I feel like crap through the day. So, that would be number 1 for me. 

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Number 2, for me, would be really unconscious about it, didn't think about rejuvenation, last thing on my mind and got a half decent sleep, but still, you know, no other, no other thought about it. 

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A number 3 for me would be, you know, I was a bit more conscious of rejuvenation, I planned to go to bed a bit early, I did have the right amount of sleep and I feel pretty good through the day. 

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A number 4 would be; I planned my rest in the sense of sleep at night, but I also looked at maybe taking breaks throughout the day. Maybe every hour, taking a break from the computer and doing some stretches. 

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At number 5 would be like I had conscious planned rejuvenation through the day. Sometimes, that only happens on a Sunday for me. However, I'd really like to get my score up to 5 more in rejuvenation. The importance of rejuvenating and sleep are just as important as go.. go..go and all the activities that you could do in the day. All the other leadership stuff is obviously pending on your rejuvenation. Do you have the energy to do it? So, number 5 for me would be impeccable rejuvenation; very planned, very, like maybe at lunchtime, taking my eyes from the computer, putting my head down or having a little rest or a meditation, maybe two meditations through the day and, I don't know, I went for a massage or something like that that day. So, planned again rejuvenation, allowing the body to rejuvenate. So again, that's number 5 would be a high level of planning and executing and actually living that. 

[20:15]  

So, nutrition. Again, this one is a lot easier, but again, subjective to everyone listening here. So, number 1 would be, you know, I ate takeout food, or I ate food with that was quick and easy, lots of preservatives and it didn't do very well that day. 

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Number 2 would be I went through my day, you know, maybe bit unconscious about food, not even sure what I took in that day.

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Number 3 would be somewhere along the lines of; I planned my meals and I did pretty well. Still wasn't the best food that I could take in that day. 

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Number 4 would be that I really planned and executed well, but maybe missed a little bit here and there, maybe didn't get enough water through the day, but I got some good food in.

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Number 5 would be; it was impeccable. Again, you know, having my food planned from the day before, taking time to actually eat that food and eating it well through the day. and it'll all being healthy food. 

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As you can see, you know, if we're looking at these areas of exercise, attitude, rejuvenation and nutrition, you're probably starting to see that they all play on each other. So, if I didn't get a good enough rejuvenation, do you think that would affect my exercise and attitude? And maybe nutrition? Maybe, I don't have the time to put the food together. 

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Same thing with nutrition? If I had a really low score on nutrition, do you think it might have an effect on, you know, attitude, how I'm feeling through the day and how I'm reacting to things, if I don't have the right food in me and my exercise, I probably won't be able to push as hard if I don't have the right nutrition. 

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And you know, same thing with exercise. If you look at exercise, if you're not feeling good physically and you don't have the energy that you need through the day, will it affect your attitude, rejuvenation and nutrition? 

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And attitude? Obviously, if your attitude is not so good, will it affect the other areas of your life like exercise, rejuvenation, and nutrition? 

[22:36] 

And absolutely, they're all intertwined, they all are interconnected with each other. And most importantly, they go beyond us. They affect everyone around us, our children, our colleagues at work, our friends, our community. Anyone that's around us is going to get the residual of how we are being through the day. And that being really comes from this leadership tool here. I mean, if we are focused on improving each of these areas of our life, we can start observing who am I being that's, you know, not taking my exercise seriously? Who am I being that's not wanting to develop my attitude? Who am I being that like, I just don't need as much rest as everyone else, I can get by and then we're tired all the time? Who am I being that, like, I'm just slamming down, you know, hamburgers all day, and then thinking that I'm going to have the energy to execute all day? 

[23:50]  

So, it really gives us a good observation of who we're being and allows us to change that. So, if we looked at our earned scores every single day; now it's very important that you do this at the end of the day. So, the end of the day, this is sometime in the evening. before you go to bed, you're looking back at your day and you're quickly looking at the E where was I today? I was a 3. A, where was I today? I was a 3. Rejuvenation R, I was a 4 today. Nutrition, not so good. I was a 2 today. 

[24:30]  

I want you to capture that each day. At the end of the week, and I will give you a sheet to work off of on the show notes, you can click on that and it will bring you to one of these sheets you can download, but at the end of the week, you look at your own scores and you're calculating them. But you'll also notice patterns. Within those patterns, you will know instinctively, almost automatically, what's going wrong. What is it within you that you need to change in order to improve your exercise or improve your attitude or your rejuvenation or nutrition? What is it within you that you need to work on? And that's an internal thing, it's a being thing. 

[24:41]  

Now, if you want to take this tool and your leadership to a whole new level, the best way to participate with this tool is to actually do it with others and I highly recommend doing this with two other people. So, A, just at the end of your day, you're literally just tracking your score for your E, your A, you R and your N. That's it. Okay? You can put notes next to it if you choose to, but also, share this podcast with at least two other people that you want to have a bit of accountability with, and you'll notice that by participating with other people, you're kind of all motivating yourselves and supporting each other on becoming better and better each day. 

[25:31]  

I noticed that my scores on my own really took me to one level, but, when I got into call it a little triad, three people, I had to remove my own excuses and I got to hear other people's examples of what was going on for them and different things that that they were looking at themselves. Or, they would point things out to me. Or, I would point things out to them. We all just committed to supporting each other in this growth tool and what that looks like timewise was, we would set up every Sunday, for about a half hour on the phone call and we would discuss our scores with each other, just by simply stating our scores and any observations about ourselves and we would take time to listen to other people, the other two people, as they would state their scores, and any observations they made about themselves. 

[27:03]  

We would never make each other wrong but we would point out any trends that we saw to each other over time. So, if we saw the same thing, same excuses, week after week, for weeks on end, we would say, 'Hey, I noticed you've been saying that, you know, just you might not hear it, but you've been saying the same thing over and over and maybe that's what's stopping you. That might be what you want to look at', and that was really helpful because, you know, ourselves, we can only see and hear so much. When it comes to our patterns, and to have other people listen to us, like truly listen to us, they can pick up on those patterns for us and that could be one of the, maybe in some cases, a big distinction between, you know, being really good or being great at something. 

[27:52]  

And also, one other thing to point out when working with a triad, two other people, as accountability partners, very important to understand that these numbers are subjective and you're not to compare each other. Because, if you do that, it becomes a competition and it's not about beating each other. It's about becoming the best person you can become through this tool. So, I highly recommend if you can do this with two other people. You can do this on your own. Definitely. But, sharing it with other people will really take it to a whole new level. They'll create a level of accountability to make sure that you are being reflective at the end of the day, looking back at your day, even if it was a shitty one and writing down your answers to that.

[28:43]  

Tomorrow, we wake up, it's a whole new day. We could choose to be different and we can choose to be productive in those areas. So, my recommendation really is to share this gets to other people going with you. If you can't get two, get at least one other person and again, if you can't, and you can only do this on your own, regardless, it's still going to give you better outcomes leaps and bounds over what's happening for you today in the sense that most of us are not conscious. We kind of just get through the day. We look back and then we go 'Oh, yeah, like it was a shitty day'. But, if we can raise our consciousness in these four areas and put more attention to these areas, you'll see a huge difference in your outcome through the day, how you make decisions, how you'll slow things down and how you will have a much better day. 

[29:45]  

At least, those were the outcomes for me. My day was a heck of a lot better by doing their own scores versus not doing their own scores and if you take your scores at the end of the day and you ask yourself these questions, and I would say they're hard questions, what is it within me that I need to change in order to have a better day? What is it within me that I need to change, in order to have a better week? 

[30:12]  

We need to stop pointing our fingers externally and really pointing internally and taking ownership for our outcome of the day and if we have more control over our exercise, attitude, rejuvenation, and nutrition, I promise you, you will have a better outcome through the day. Regardless of what life throws at you every day, you'll have better response to it and therefore a much better day. 

[30:37]  

I hope this podcast really helps. Please subscribe, please share, especially if you know anybody in the leadership world, or anybody looking to improve their life in any way, I truly believe this is the greatest leadership tool that's out there today and please go to the show notes, click on the download so you can have a copy of this tool for yourself and my promise is, if you take it serious and you are actually doing the work and looking at who you're being in this whole process and who you're being in the exercise and the other areas and you take ownership for those ways of being and continue to ask yourself, what work do I have to do on the inside in order to improve these areas; if you do that daily, we're talking a couple minutes a day. 

[31:27]  

And you know, it's really funny, I asked many people in the past, how much time do you spend working on yourself? And, you know, going to the gym and all that is not working on yourself. It's the five minutes. That's working on your body, yes, but it's the 5 to 10 minutes, that you're sitting down and asking these questions, observing yourself and taking ownership and making internal change on yourself. That is doing work on yourself and very few people are doing any work on themselves. 

[32:00]  

If you haven't had the chance to leave any reviews, please do so. Please share the podcast with anybody who you think may want to listen and really appreciate it. I hope you got a lot of value out of today. Thank you.