Dec. 4, 2020

Episode #15 - Fear And Faith Are The Same Thing, Why Do We Choose Fear Over Faith?

Episode #15 - Fear And Faith Are The Same Thing, Why Do We Choose Fear Over Faith?

Why do we let fear stop us from achieving the things we want in our life?  Well, fear is built deep into our subconscious internal dialogue.  When you listen to this podcast you will have a new view of fear and you will learn new ways to move forward.

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Transcript

(00:00):

Welcome to be x do = have a simple formula to Uncomplicate your life. My name is Malvin Young. I'm a speaker entrepreneur and brand partnership manager with a well-known TV production company. This show is about a straightforward formula that I've used to coach hundreds of people over the last 15 years to overcome many challenges. Personally, I don't like to coach on any area of life that I haven't improved on myself. So lucky for you. I've had to overcome big challenges in the areas of relationship, finances, health, anxiety, and depression. Then after a crazy car accident, I had to do it all over again. I'm really excited about this show today, because what I'm about to share with you is made a huge impact on my life. And more importantly, I've seen many others who have practices methods, breakthrough barriers that have been holding them back their entire lives. Also, please subscribe to get the most value out of this podcast. As each episode, we'll build on each other.

(00:58):

We get into today's conversation. I want to share with you a company called Instacart. Instacart is an online shopping service. If you're in Canada and the us, and what this app does is you literally log on based on your postal code or your zip code. And they'll tell you all the shops locally that you can shop from. You literally choose what it is that you want. They do the shopping for you, and they deliver it to you. It's a great service. And right now you can try it for free. For two weeks. All you have to do is go to www dot Malvin, young.com forward slash Instacart and full disclosure. Here, we do receive a small fee for each person that does sign up and tries the service out. So for each of you trying the service, it really helps our podcast here. Thank you so much for doing that.

(01:54):

Welcome to episode number 15, where we're going to talk about fear and faith and how they're the same thing. You're probably wondering right at the beginning here, how is this the same thing? They sound like total polar opposites. They're completely different. And so I thought originally as well too, and I want you to know when we're speaking about fear and faith, we're speaking in the context of like anxiety, depression, stress. We're not talking about fear in the context of like a buses coming at you and your fear kicks in and you have to jump away from it. We're talking about more of the common fear that we face on a daily basis. The things that hold us back from doing things. So I just wanted to make sure that we understand that that's the kind of fear we're talking about here and to understand this whole thing about fear and faith being the exact same thing.

(02:51):

We must understand the nature of fear and the nature of faith. I'm only going to speak from there because if we look the dictionary version of fear, I mean, there's plenty different ways of describing fear and same as faith. There's many different ways of describing them, but the essence of both of them are exactly the same. If you really look through all of those definitions of fear, you'll see, see at the core of it. What they're really trying to say is that fear. If I were to define it based on what they're saying as a mix of all of that is I would say this way, fear has you even something that has not happened yet. That's exactly what they're trying to say. So fear is a psychological thing. It affects you physically as well, but generally it's because we're thinking about sorry, thing that hasn't happened yet.

(03:49):

So an example for me is I might be, we went to a party, but I might be thinking, Oh man, like, I'm probably not going to feel well when I get there, I might have an anxiety attack or a panic attack. And therefore the fear kicks in. Okay. So that's an example of fear. Like I'm thinking of something that hasn't happened yet. So if we look at the word faith, we're actually faced with the same nature. So we're now just looking at something more as a positive outcome. But again, the nature of it is the same thing, which is you're believing in something that has not happened yet. Like I have faith that this is going to happen. Like I'm going to do the sales call and I have faith that they're going to say yes to me. But essence of it is really that you're believing in something that has not happened yet.

(04:44):

So if we put them side by side, they're exactly the same fear believing in something that has not happened yet. And that might just be a negative thing. Faith believing in something that has not happened yet, it might be just more of a positive thing, but the essence are they're exactly the same. So why is it's that when we're faced with challenges in life or that we're faced with scenarios scare us, that we tend to choose fear over faith? What is it about us that, that does this? Why do we lean more towards the fear than the faith? Well, the reality is that we've been taught for a long time to stay safe, you know, protect yourself, self don't get hurt. I mean, we're talking this over and over by our parents, our teachers, our peers. So we have this automatic built-in reaction to react to the future more so on the fierce side than the faith side.

(05:45):

So we look at the future and, you know, we might make predictions that will fall more on the fear side. Like a really good example for me is skydiving. Okay. Like literally I'm terrified of the thing. It hasn't even happened yet. I haven't even got on the plane. I haven't gone through the training. I haven't done anything. Like there's so much within skydiving that I don't even know that I don't even know, but yet I'm terrified. And so I operate from this place called fear. Okay. Although faith is the same thing. I literally could say, you know what? I'm going to learn this. I'm going to grow through this. And when I'm ready to make that jump, sure. There might be a bit of nervousness, but I have faith. I'm going to be okay. I'm training with some of the best people. So really what it comes down to situations in life.

(06:47):

You have a choice here. You can choose between fear and you could choose between faith. Why? Because both of them have not happened yet. So it's your choice. When I learned that a lot of my anxiety dropped, like it just went down because I realized, first of all, I have choice. I don't have to be stuck in the situation of fear all the time. I can actually stop and say, well, what if it works? What if this happens? You know, you ever hear this common theme in society when people are working together on a project and it might be a big lofty project and you hear this common thing come up like, well, what if it doesn't work? You know, and everyone gets down like, yeah, you know, then we lose our money. Then we lose our time. Then it wasn't really worth it. But then if you spark the question like, Hey guys, what if this works?

(07:45):

What if it actually works? You see a new energy arises where people are like, yeah, man, what if it does work, man, we're going to make a lot of money. We're going to be you. We're, we're going to get some great results from this. We're going to get to grow a company together, whatever it is, but you just get excited from it. So really what there is to look at here is that fear and faith, the nature is exactly the same. However, the real difference between them is the emotional symptoms and the physical symptoms that you get from both. And when you understand this, you'll probably start choosing faith over fear in much more situations than you are right now. So here are the fear. This fear often involves both physical and emotional symptoms. Each person may experience fear differently, but some of the common signs and symptoms of fear include chest pain, chills, dry mouth nausea, rapid heartbeat, shortness of sweating, trembling, upset, stomach and adult or dark future.

(09:03):

So by choosing fear, these are some of the symptoms that are are occurring when we choose it. Maybe not at an extreme level right away, but the more we keep choosing fear, the more we start experiencing these symptoms. Now let's look at the side effects. There are both side effects as well, physical and emotional side effects when we choose faith. So if we're having faith in something that's going to work out here are the side-effects confidence belief in ourselves. And the way the world works, body feeling at ease, excitement, future looks bright or hopeful energy healing takes place in the body and creativity becomes available. So now when you're thinking about a situation where you generally have fear, what I would really highly recommend is that you choose faith to start practicing, to choose faith, get some of these good symptoms and side-effects going on.

(10:19):

And you'll start experiencing more results and experiencing world the world in a more positive way, because you're getting these type of symptoms and feedback from making the choice of faith. It's crazy. When we really think about this and break it down, they're both exactly the same thing. So why wouldn't we just choose faith, have faith in something, have faith in the future, have faith in the outcome. And I'm going to give you a really good example of how just shifting from fear to faith can change our whole perception and give us a totally different outlook on life. I personally dealt a lot with so I had a really bad car accident that I talked about before. And after that car accident, I really dealt at a very high level of health anxiety. Like I just thought everything was going to kill me. Didn't matter what it was like.

(11:20):

If it was a really bad pain, if I got really sick, I would just think I'm dying. And I think that kind of spawned from, you know, I'm in a car driving and another car swerves out in front of me at 120 kilometers an hour. I have no time to hit the brake. And while LA I'm in this crazy accident and a lot of pain. So I guess my brain went from like, you better protect yourself. Cause you don't know when something's going to come at you. So from that point on, no matter what went on with me, I had this fear that I was going to die. Something was going to happen, happened to me. So yeah, I had to start practicing this faith over fear in many situations. And I'm going to give you an example of one of them. Let's talk about death in it.

(12:08):

Self. A lot of people are afraid of death, but more people are afraid of public speaking. Funny enough. But the reason reality is that we have these fears and they're, they're kind of built in. They feel like they're so strong and they're so real, but I had this fear of death after the car accident. And I could go, I want to continue to think that the way I grew up around this whole topic of death was that when you die, you go in a box and it's all like the game is done. That's not very exciting for me, but by changing the perception, you know, learn from another person. And I don't know what is true here, but I learned from another person, another theory around Beth was that when you die, your body goes in a casket in a box, but you're right. Energy, your spirit, it lives on forever.

(13:01):

It goes in and out of physical form. Now I don't know which one is true and I probably will not know until I do di, but which one do you think makes me feel better? Which one do you think makes me operate better on a daily basis? Obviously the fact that our energy lives on and life continues on, I would rather believe in that, which is more of a faith thought than a Duma thoughts, like a fear thought. And therefore I'd rather operate from that thinking. I don't know. What's true. The people who told me these stories that you go in a box nine, your end, or you go on a box and your energy lives on, they don't know the truth. We don't know the truth until we're dead ourselves.

(13:49):

But again, faith allows me to operate in the world a heck of a lot better, better than fear. If I to wake up every single day thinking, and I was going through this, that something's going to happen and I'm going to end up in a box and it's all over. And my poor children are going to live without me. And it's just a terrifying thought. So, and this goes for many things. So let's just say you're stuck in the scenario of, I remember I had a hard time driving after my car. Excellent. And I can tell you, there was a lot of fear and I would like picture myself. I had a hard time sleeping, especially if I go on a long drive, I had a hard time sleeping because I'd be thinking things like, man, I got this long drive tomorrow and what if I get in an accident?

(14:39):

And Oh my God, I'm going to have the kids with me. And I don't know if I could do this. And I would start coming up with excuses to not even go like, just kill off the entire possibility of going on the trip or even worse, going on an airplane where I have no control over flying that airplane. That was even worse for me. Those were some of my scenarios that I faced were fear was just an automatic choice. It seemed like it was the only thing I had. I had to look and do everything I can do, even if it was lie, cheat, whatever, to get myself into a comfortable space so that I wouldn't have to face those scenarios. Now I can only imagine if I continued living on like that, I would have fell into a deeper and deeper depression. I don't think, I don't think there was any access to life at all by operating that way. So I had no choice if I want to have my life back. I had to start thinking with a more of a faith mindset.

(15:45):

And what that looked like for me was a bit of internal dialogue in the sense that these fears would be the automatic thoughts that would come up when I had to go on a trip anywhere. But there was a little bit of internal dialogue that I started having, which was, you know, the brain comes up with these thoughts of scenarios of everything that can happen to you and you get tensed up and scared and all that kind of stuff. But I started realizing that they're just stories. They're not true. They're just stories trying to protect me. The brain is always trying to protect you all the time. So I had to start saying to myself, like what people used to say a crazy man was talking to himself. I found out is the best thing you could do is when I would hear those thoughts, I would just say, Hey, thanks for trying to help me out, man.

(16:37):

I'm not interested though. That would kind of quiet the brain down a little bit. Thanks for helping me out. I understand your purpose. I know you're trying to keep me safe. Thank you. I'm just not interested. And why I would say that first is because I had to quiet it down enough so that I could start saying things like this is going to be a great trip. I'm going to take my time. We're going to arrive safe and we're going to listen to good music along the way. And we're going to stop at some great places. So the kids can learn some things on our long trip and it's going to be a great trip. See that kind of conversation. That kind of motivating faith conversation to myself is not possible when the mind is constantly saying, don't do it. Something's going to happen. Or what if something happens?

(17:37):

You know, like don't leave at this time. Because at that time there's a lot of traffic and it's more likely you're going to get into accident. It's like the only way I can have an authentic, true thought about a new possibility of arriving safe was to quiet the brain down and understand its purpose. Its purpose is to keep me safe. Once I understood that I started applying it to almost everything in my life. You know, I'm not perfect at this. Still sometimes fear comes up very strong and I get some of those symptoms. I mean, I get the sweaty palms and the trembling and sometimes the fear could be so strong. It could send me right into a panic attack. However, recognizing that that's all that's happening is that you are getting fear symptoms. You're getting, you know, the brain is just going on, trying to protect you.

(18:35):

Your job at that point is to quiet the brain down. The only way that I know to quiet the brain down is to understand its purpose, respect that, and acknowledge that, and then move into more of a positive conversation. Like I'm going to arrive safe. It's going to be a great trip. Can't wait to get there and explore a bunch of new things. I'm excited about this trip today and going on with your day. I think the more we're stuck in our, in, in our heads, we also will have more fear conversations. So I always try to tell people, you know, stay on the faith side of things. Things are going to work out. However, also try to participate in a lot of things through the day so that the brain isn't so loud, the more tactics you have in quieting the brain down, the more opportunity you have to choose from more of a faith optimistic outlook on how things may turn out.

(19:36):

So I'd love you guys to try this on, you know, as life occurs for you and you know, things that can bring up anxiety and fear for you. I want you to try to say to that fear, Hey, thanks. I know you love me. I appreciate it. You're trying to save me here, trying to help me out and keep me safe. I understand I get it. And I respect it. However, I really want to do this skydiving, or I really want to take this trip inside, man. I'm just so excited to do this and I know it's going to work out. It's going to be fine and I can't wait to do it. So I really hope this helps you who, you know, helps you with the process of dealing with fear and anxiety. Again, it is something that needs to be practiced.

(20:25):

It's something that you need to try on more than once, like doing this for five minutes once isn't going to change your life, it literally is just changing your perception. Ha trying on this new way of thinking the long enough so that it becomes your new dominant way of thinking right now, majority of people's dominant way of thinking is fear-based. So we want to make sure that it's faith-based and it's the more dominant one and it could take you months, even years. So weeks if you practice really hard and really go at it, you know, but the reality is everyone's different in a different

(21:02):

Situation. And it also depends how much fear is bothering you. If it's bothering you a lot, you'll tend to make the change quicker if you have the right tools. So if you try these tools on and they're making sense to you, you'll tend to adapt to them heck of a lot quicker. Anyway, thank you so much for listening. I hope you got something out of this conversation today. If you got something and you feel that you need to share it please share it with anybody and everybody. I think we're all dealing with a state of fear with everything going on in the world. Right now we could all use a little bit of faith towards what the future looks like. And also if you haven't had the opportunity, please take the time to leave a review. It really helps when we have more reviews it allows more people to access the podcast. And again, thank you guys. I'm really appreciative of all my listeners and everyone who's sharing this content. Have a great day and we'll talk to you later. Take care.